


haunting heartstrings

by wintersweather



Series: adronitis [3]
Category: Polygon/McElroy Vlogs & Podcasts RPF
Genre: Birthday, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-14
Updated: 2018-08-14
Packaged: 2019-06-27 13:51:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,142
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15686712
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wintersweather/pseuds/wintersweather
Summary: there's a million people just like me, but there's no one i'd dare compare to you





	haunting heartstrings

**Author's Note:**

> title/excerpt from "a million people" by william beckett!
> 
>  
> 
> this can be read as a follow-up to my stories "caught up in the trivial" and "comforting"!

Sometimes, life just wasn't fair.

Brian should've known something would go awry for him soon, considering everything else had been going too well for too long. Universal balances and all that shit.

Pat's birthday was Tuesday, but Brian had scheduled a flight to Scotland before he knew. It was too late to cancel, the site told him, that he was stuck with an 8am flight and to get the hell over it.

And Brian might not have even minded too much if it wasn't Pat's first birthday since they started dating. He felt like an asshole for missing it.

If Pat minded, he didn't let it show. "Oh, no problem." He said when Brian told him. "Really, don't worry about it, Bri. We can hang out when you get back." A smile.

It did little to make Brian feel any better. "I'm so sorry." Brian sighed, leaning against the counter. They were in Pat's apartment, a week before the flight.

"It's not a big deal, babe. I know you wish you could be here, but," Pat shrugged. "I'm turning 31, not dying."

"But it's the only time you'll turn 31! And I'm gonna miss it!" Brian all-but-wailed.

Pat seemed amused. "Oh well. I'll be 32 next year, and you can be with me for that, right?" It wasn't really a question, and it didn't much help Brian calm down.

He didn't want to wait until next year. He wanted to be here _now_.

Pat kissed his cheek. "Don't beat yourself up over it, sweetheart. You didn't know." He said quietly.

Pat's eyes looked soft and kind behind his glasses. It made Brian feel even worse in a way. "I feel horrible."

"Stop," Pat said, a bit more forcefully. "Quit worrying. You're gonna get yourself all worked up."

Brian was already halfway there. Pat could always tell how he was feeling, and he wasn't certain if it was some soulmates shit or if Brian was just really poor at hiding his emotions. Maybe a little of both.

\- - -

Brian started packing on night of the 13th, reminiscing about E3. He had a lot of good, overwhelming fun there. He didn't miss California's weather or the bronchitis he may or may not have got, but he missed sitting with everyone in the den, half drunk and laughing about everything.

Pat was quiet in group settings. He didn't feel the need to fill the silences. He spoke when it felt relevant, or to tell a joke that got everyone cracking up for the next few minutes.

Brian was the opposite. Talking was both and defense and welcoming mechanism for him. It verged on inconvenient sometimes.

To an outsider, they might as well have been the sun and the moon. Sometimes, Brian himself wondered how they worked well together in any capacity.

His phone went off, startling him out of his thoughts. He left himself a reminder to call Pat at midnight. 

Pat picked up after two rings. "Hello?"

Brian didn't say anything before he started belting out a rendition of "Happy Birthday" into the receiver. He didn't even care if Jonah and Laura told him to shut up.

Pat was laughing by the time Brian had finished. "I love you." He said, a smile evident in his voice.

It never failed to make Brian feel butterflies all over again. "I love you, too." He replied.

"I hope you have a really good time in Scotland." Pat said genuinely, and Brian felt sad all over again.

"Be better if you could come with me." He answered, laying back on the floor and sighing up at the ceiling.

Pat chucked a bit. "Yeah, that'd be cool."

"I'll take you with me next time, okay?" Brian said, letting himself imagine it for a brief moment.

"Promise?" Pat asked, tone teasing.

"I promise."

\- - -

The sun was barely up 5 hours later, and Brian was already making more mistakes. 

He didn't know why he was outside of Pat's apartment, taking deep breaths and listening to the pigeons start to coo. Maybe he'd fully gone batshit this time. It was dumb, and he was dumb, yet he still went inside. He still went up to Pat's floor, and he still knocked on his door.

The minutes went by. Brian felt stupid for even coming here at all, starting to turn away to just suck it up and go to the airport.

The door creaked open, and there was Pat in a black tanktop, hair messy, looking barely awake.

Brian didn't wait for him to say anything. "Good morning! I'm sorry for waking you up so early, but I had to see you. I got two hours of sleep and I'm running purely on caffeine." He half-explained, pace quick. He was trying to keep his voice down, but it was proving difficult.

"Bri, it's 5:45 AM." Pat mumbled, running his eyes behind his glasses. "I have work today."

"I know, I'm so sorry. But it's your birthday, and I couldn't not see you." Brian said, and felt a little stupid again.

Pat didn't answer for a long moment, stating impressively down at Brian. Finally, he reached out and wrapped his arms around Brian, pulling him close and squeezing tight.

Brian could hear Pat's heartbeat, strong and steady, like it always was. He wasn't sure why he started tearing up, leaving little drop-sized wet marks on Pat's shirt.

"Shh," Pat quieted him, kissing the top of his head.

"I'm a shitty boyfriend." Brian said, more miserable than he'd felt in awhile.

"Shh," Pat repeated, rocking them both back and forth a little in the doorway. "No you're not, baby boy. I love.you so much."

Pat's voice sounded low, reverberating through his chest. "I love you, too." Brian whispered.

Pat let him go a few moments later. "You've got a plane to catch." He said, smiling down at Brian.

Brian nodded, wiping his eyes. "Yeah, unfortunately I do." He replied, still sniffling. "But I got you something."

"You didn't need to do that." Pat answered, running his hand through his own hair.

"Well, I did." Brian pulled the watch out of his pocket, holding it out to Pat. It was vintage, maybe from the 60s, a little tarnished but still readable. The band was black, and the time was wrong: 11am.

Well, wrong for New York. It was 11 in Scotland.

Pat beamed, looking a bit more awake now. "Oh, Brian, I love it." He said, barely above a whisper.

Brian helped him fasten it around his left wrist. "It's the least I could do." He said. The watch looked perfect, like it was meant for Pat.

Pat kissed Brian, one hand cupping the back of his head and the other going to his waist. Brian stood on his toes, tossing his arms around Pat's neck.

For a fleeting moment, nothing else mattered.

**Author's Note:**

> i feel like it's been Ages since i got back to my roots and wrote a dumb cutesy story and it's pat's birthday so Here's This!
> 
>  
> 
> also! you can find me on tumblr @easterntimecryptid, and I just made a twitter as well! it's @estcryptid!


End file.
